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I wonder if it's possible for me to sue Youtube for fucking up my brain and making me go blind.

I think need to go to Youtube anonymously.
My blood's still rushing down from head to toe as i just finished my chacha dance practice a while ago. it's funny coz the whole office were dancing in one room, from the general manager to intern *like me* were swinging towards eachother like an ocean of moving bodies. i dunno abt the deal since i just joined the company not so long ago, i guessed they've been practicing for the upcoming international convention in Bali. sounds like fun to me.

As i was watching people dancing, i realize how important the comfortability when you dance in partners, oh well since it is Latin Dance, you HAVE to dance in partners. I was surprisingly nervous when i gotta start learning the step, *note: i hate learning steps to dance, i dance to the rhythm of my feet* I started to step on my partner's feet and missing the counts whenever i have to look into his eyes. Eyes have been my weak points on people so i wasn't suprised.

By the time i felt comfortable they always stole my partner. Aarrgghhh...dammit, but finally I did ok with Ian who, apart from twiching me around too fast and chatting during the dance *made me lose concentration but i guessed that's his comforting remedy*, could lead me on the floor successfully. that's the thing for you fellas out there, lead the ladies !!!

The instructor said I did great job coz I could catch up with the others all the routine they've been practicing for 2 months. And I did it within an hour.

No wonder I sprain my ankle.

Battling teenage raging hormones
This happened back in Perth, Marco shared Advanced English class with me, Alinta was my roomate, and Nick was her bf, well...maybe still is.

Marco: Dude, did I tell you about the dream I had?!
Inan: No. (cheekily) Was it dirty?
Marco: You were in it.
Inan: Was it dirty?
Marco: And so was Alinta.
Marco: Oh yeah. It was totally dirty. You were sitting on my lap and french-kissing me.
Inan: No way! Alinta! Come here!
Alinta: (comes over)
Inan: Dude... tell Alinta about your dream.
Marco: Inan french-kissed me.
Inan: Isn't that cool?
Marco: You were in it too Alinta. It was kind of a threesome.
Alinta: Oh yeah?
Inan: Oh yeah... I'm so bad. Yo Nick! Nick! Come here.
Nick: (comes over)
Inan: Marco, tell Nick.

I'm so proud of myself. I'm tainting people in dreams as well as in reality.

If you can get me these I will be yours forever !!!


I've never really been one of those girls who understood why women in porn flicks keep their shoes on-- my shoes are the first thing to go as soon as I decide to step out of my clothes. But I would gladly leave these on during the *ehem* because they are the most perfectly dirty and sexy things on this planet.

Wow. So this is what it feels like to have a foot fetish.


April Fools' Day
Dad: So when are you actually coming back to Japan?
Nanzy: Next Friday... umm... April 1st, I think.
Dad: April 1st? You sure you want to be flying on April Fools Day?
Nanzy: He he he.

*scene: Nanzy in the plane 35 000 feet up in the air, in the middle of the inflight movie. Suddenly, the plane jolts downward and starts to shake. The engines screech loudly. Passengers start to scream. The PA system comes on.*

Captain: *with anxiety in his voice* Ladies and - er... Gentlemen, we're - er.. just passing through some some bad weather... b-b-but we're almost through the worst of it. So just strap - er... yourselves in and stay calm... this turbulence will be over soon. Thanks.

*PA system clicks off but hasn't been shut off properly.*

Co-Pilot: *on the radio* - you read me? I repeat - CAN YOU READ ME? This is Korean Airline flight KE 628! We have lost power in the right engine and need assistance! I repeat - This is Korean Airline flight KE 628! Is anyone......

Captain: *sobs* I don't want to diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeee.
Co-Pilot: *SLAP* Pull yourself together man! You're the damn pilot, for God's sake!
Captain: waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

*A flight attendant runs by to shut the PA off. Suddenly the plane begins to descend steeply. Another flight attendant screams past. The oxygen masks fall out of the ceiling.*

Random Passenger: The end is niiiiiigh! Brother and sisters, now is the time to ask the Lord Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins!

*Suddenly, the plane levels off sharply and everything falls silent again. Everything is somehow back to normal. You can hear some of the passengers still sobbing.*

Captain: PSYCHE! Happy April Fools' Day, muthafuckaaaaz!
Oh Starbucks billboard... why do you tease me so???

I'm sure they put crack in the coffee. This addiction can't be from normal coffee beans.

Perhaps those planes hovering above the plantation aren't spraying pesticide...
r. people are stupid.
d. people aren't stupid. look at the guy who made weed, tv, rubber.
r. *chuckle
r. priorities, prioties. Wherever did I leave my priorities behind?
d. ok ok, we all live in one world...

r. nu uh! there are definitely more than one world i know.
d. name it.
r. men's world, music world, japanese world...
d. true huh? they differ from eachother. but i still believe in one world.
r. hmm?
d. the unfair world
r. *speechless
and i was half a human
R. Do you like my skirt?
D. Yeah it looks good on you. I like your outfits, dude.
R. Thx I love pretty outfits.
D. Every girl deserves pretty outfit, I guess.
R. Including me, yeah..
D. No, not you. You're not even a human.
R. What?
D. I think you're not. Do u realize that u raved in your sleep last night and asked me to clean your wings? That's not a human-like rave, baby.
R. *eyes roll*
D. Am serious, I even recorded it coz it was so funny.
R. What? No way..lemme hear it lemme hear it !!!

D plays back R's voice on the cell-phone

CP: "boo..errr..clean my, umm.., wings, errr..hurry, yeah that, no, left one left one"

R. OH MY GOD, I sound retarded! I can't believe you did that!
D Laughs
R. I hate you shithead !
D. What? U callin me shithead?
R. Ok, I hate you sweetheart ! I hate you, I hate you !!!!
D. I love you.
what the world is all about

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?"
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend.


I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs
Who owns a liquor store and a golf course
This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.
a walking contradiction
this is the letter i never sent you, and most probably never will.

august 13th.

i just hung up my phone and found my self bursting into tears. tomorrow i'll be flying home, feeling tired already just to hearing it. it's funny coz there aint nothin to be cried about. it could have been this dreadful summer heat, but am pretty much enjoy the sunshine like a fish needs a bike *blegh*

your voice on the phone brought something to my soul. the way you say hi. the tone of your weariness. your giggle, your sigh. ahh why am i here and you are there? i fuckin miss you, dammit. a year to go, and we all be livin this small town of melting pot. i am scared through and through. what's next? what's now? what's us? are we still being us? or will we not? questions over questions, i'm getting tired of curiosity and never ending story. but what if i dont want it to be ended? what about our fights? our doubts? our giveups and hatreds? am i fighting alone, or just fretting alone?

my tears dried up but my heart's still drumming the confusion, on a basically thing i'm not quite sure about. one more question, can somebody actually love less? how does love measure? what is the tendency and what makes people love more? or less? is it rude to ask, do you love me more or less? can somebody actually manage to answer?

or maybe to simplify the question, do i love you more, or you love me less?
how's that?

thats y i wont give this letter to you, it's completely bollocks and no one understands my rubbish. well, i am having the second thought of posting this but i guess i will just click the right button and please everyone.

p.s/ i hate every emotional breakdown. period.


About Me

My photo
i know people who know cool people. proud Indonesian. right-handed. quintessential pisces. the original. starting afresh. unintentionally intense. deeper than the mariana trench. smart. kind. lonely. negative. loaded. space cowboy. sweet. mildly disillusioned. first child. too sensitive for her own good. short & curvy. never cruel. kinky. flippant. loud. singing into hairbrush. dirty dirty dirty words. silly. affectionate. self conscious. occasionally elitist. lost?


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